I don't tend to write much when I am feeling down. Like most people I prefer to hide away when things aren't going the best. I don't like to share that I am struggling or that I need help. I prefer to keep it all in and try to deal with it myself.
Well, I try to deal with it mostly by myself. Inevitably my mother, my fiancee and my closest friends hear about my big struggles, but I don't usually go write a blog about them. Perhaps I should be more transparent, but to be honest, I don't really want to.
I have to say that in the last several months I have really struggled. Among all the changes in my life in the past six months, I feel like I have been constantly faking excitedness, happiness and enthusiam. I was excited to move to Minot and start a new life, but there so many different things going on, many days my excitement felt forced. But I am happy to say that now more often than not I don't feel like I am faking it anymore. I feel like I might actually be making it.
God's blessings to you, Justine! Even good change causes emotional stress; it's normal; it's okay. There is a bit of grieving of the loss of the old even in the face of the "bound to be good" unknown of the new. The loss is stress, the unknown is stress. If you ever want a pastor or old camper friend to talk to... I'll be there for you. --Armand
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